Use it or Lose it

(Classic office prank)

As the saying goes if you don’t use something you lose it.

First thing that comes to mind is the mind. If you don’t do anything, all day, day after day... you’ll go friggin crazy. You really will lose your mind. I am basically at that point right now. And as time goes on with nothing to do, the more that you want to do nothing! Now, if an opportunity to “analyze some data” comes along, it’s all I can do to make my self look at the work. Not because Im too busy, but because my brain is gotten all mushy and it’s hard to focus on anything in particular.
Imagine a young kid sitting in a swivel chair for the first time just spinning around for until eventually the chair pops off its stand and spills its contents into the floor. Its getting really hard to refrain myself from just spinning away....

Second thing that comes to mind is employees. If ya don’t give them something to do... they are gonna find something to do... Probably something you don’t want them to be doing. Either way, use ‘em or lose ‘em.

So, I started sending out applications the other day (on company time). Even got a few good leads... but who knows. I think if I sit here long enough I will at some point collect a nice pink piece of paper and a check to go with it. That wouldn’t be too bad. Then I can sit at home and do nothing there...
So, anyway, before my brain slowly dribbles out my ear and down the side of my head into a puddle on the desk, I came up with a top 10 ways to kill time at work.

10. Surf the net. – pretty obvious, but it works, and its not like your ever gonna run out of net, even though there are definitely days I think I get pretty close.

9. Look up dream vacations. – Caution, this could lead to impromptu purchases of said vacations, which is fine, but could get expensive!

8. Research other jobs - dreams of a brighter tomorrow.

7. Take up smoking - Big time killer here! Going out side, smoking, walking around, each smoke break can last 10 minuets, with just a few before and after lunch, you have knocked out a whole hour!

6. Buy stuff on ebay. My co-worked spends lots of time on ebay, shopping, selling, buying… you can truly find anything you would ever possibly want, and even if you don’t buy, its fun to window shop

5. Take coffee breaks – I don’t really want coffee all day long, but taking a break to walk around and get some Java breaks up the day. Especially, if you go somewhere other than the closest place to get coffee. Sure they have it on my floor, but they also have it in the lobby, and it take way longer to get all the way to the lobby than it does to walk down to the lunch room. There is also a much higher chance of running into some one you know, in the lobby, which could lead to a conversation, there by killing even more time.

4. If you have something to do, do it. Then delete it, and do it again. This is a good one because even though it’s redundant it keeps you busy and more importantly makes everyone else think you are really busy.

3. Schedule meetings with other people that have nothing to do. This is great because it kills time for you and others while also giving the appearance of looking busy and productive!

2. Office pranks – office pranks are awesome and totally not done often enough. Don’t get caught though, the point is to kill time, not your career.
(tons of cups half full of water)

The Number One way to kill time:
1. Dream up awesome new titles for your job and then order business cards with that title. Stuff like “Strategic Initiatives and Network Optimization Project Specialist”, just off the top of my head!

I think i have offically lost it.